Putting safety plans in place

This sectiom focuses on the development of medium to long-term safety plans that look at the safety of the child into the future, and provides guidance on developing effective safety plans when the alleged abuser or the parents are denying or minimising the sexual abuse allegations. While the practice considerations in this section largely relate to longer term safety planning, depending on the nature of the concerns, some considerations are applicable when engaging in immediate safety planning. 

Developing individualised safety plans with the family

Safety plans are only effective when they target the specific circumstances of each child and family and reflect current circumstances. The information below contains suggested rules and areas for practitioners to consider when talking to children and families. It can be helpful to acknowledge that these topics may be uncomfortable for the family.

Robust longer-term safety plans:

• are developed with the child, other children within the household, parent, alleged abuser, safety and support network members
• respond to the specific circumstances of the child, the parent and the alleged abuser and focus on the minutiae of their daily life
• have clearly articulated bottom lines explained to the family at the beginning of the safety planning process
• support the parent to take charge of the household
• provide monitoring of the alleged abuser 
• allow the child to inform somebody if the safety plan is not being followed or they feel unsafe
• give the parent space and time to adjust to the news that their child may be at risk of sexual abuse or has been sexually abused.

Supervision of the alleged abuser

Talking with the children

Ask children:

• How did you wake up this morning? How did you get ready for school? How did you get to school? How did you get home? What happened when you got home from school? How do you get ready for bed? How do you get to sleep at night?
• When do you spend time with [alleged abuser]? What do you do together?

Talking with the parents

Ask parents:

• Talk me through a regular weekday. How do the kids wake up? How do the kids get ready for school? How do the kids get home from school? What do the kids do when they get home? Who helps with homework? How do the kids get bathed? How do the kids get ready for bed?
• Who makes the dinner? Who is with the kids while dinner is being made?
• Are there times when you and [alleged abuser] are in different rooms in the house? Where are the kids when this is happening?
• When is [alleged abuser] likely to be at home with the kids? What help do you need to make sure he is never alone in the same room as the children?
• What will happen while you are sleeping? How will you know [alleged abuser] is not alone with the kids?

Rules about nudity and sexualised environments

There is to be no adult nakedness / near nakedness around the children - this includes wearing underwear only. The children will only be naked / nearly naked around the parent if it is necessary and developmentally appropriate. The alleged abuser will never be around the children if they are naked or near naked.

Talking with the children

Ask children:

• When are you naked? Who is there when you are naked?
• How do you go to the toilet? Do you need help wiping your bottom?
• What do you know about sex? (This question will need to be altered to suit the developmental age of the child).

Talking with parents / alleged abuser 

Ask:

• Can you tell me how nakedness / near nakedness is managed in your family?
• When are the kids naked / nearly naked?
• Do you have rules about children entering rooms where adults are naked / nearly naked or toileting?
• When is [alleged abuser] naked / nearly naked?
• Do the kids see any other adults naked / nearly naked?
• What do you think your kids know about sex? How do they know that?
• Can you think of times that your kids might have seen anyone having sex?

Rules about pornography

Talking with the children

Ask children:

• When do you look at the internet? What do you like to look at? Who do you like to look at the internet with?
• Have you ever seen pictures of naked people? Where was it? Was anyone else there?
• What does alleged abuser/ mum / dad look at on TV / the internet?
• Are there things that [mum / dad / alleged abuser] look at / watch that are only for adults? How do you know that they are watching / looking at adult things?

Talking with the parents

Ask parents:

• Do you know if the kids have ever seen pornography in magazines, on the internet, on TV? Who did they look at the pornography with?
• Some adults look at pornography or adult movies. Do you or [alleged abuser] look at pornography / adult movies? Where do you look at pornography / adult movies? Is it possible the kids may see or hear this?
• How do the kids access the internet? Where do the kids access the internet? How do you control their access to the internet? Do you use parental controls?

Physical contact

Physical contact with a child and the alleged abuser is always supervised very closely. The type of contact allowed will depend on the relationship the child has with the alleged abuser, the nature of the allegations and the specific circumstances of the child and family. As a general rule, any physical contact should be instigated by the child and be developmentally appropriate. For example, it is not appropriate for an older child to sit on the alleged abuser's knee but it may be appropriate for a much younger child, only if it is safe for this to occur.

Talking with the children

Ask children:

• How does [parent] let you know they love you? Are there things you like about that? Are there things you don’t like about that?
• How does [alleged abuser] let you know they love you / care about you? What things do you like about that? Are there things you don’t like about that?
• How do you let [parent / alleged abuser/ other safe person] know when you want a cuddle? What do you do? What do they do?
• How do you let [parent / alleged abuser / other safe person] know when you do not want a cuddle / to be touched? What do you do? What do they do?

Talking with parents / alleged abuser 

Ask:

• How do you show affection to your kids?
• How do you show affection to your parent or other adults you’re close to when the kids are around?

Other items for discussion

Assess the impact of the issues below on the child and family and determine if they need to be included in the safe family rules:

• Discipline - how do the children know when they are in trouble? Who normally disciplines the children? What kind of discipline is used? How do the children respond to this discipline?
• Privacy - who is allowed in the children’s rooms? Are the doors open or closed?
• Physical contact with other adults - are there times when the children have cuddles with other adults? What happens if they don’t want a cuddle? How do they let you know? What do you do?
• Responding to and managing overtly sexual behaviour towards other adults / children - have you noticed [child] behaving in a sexual way towards other children or adults? What do you do when this happens? (Refer to Working with children who display harmful sexual behaviour for further information on these behaviours).
• Contact that the [alleged abuser] may have with other children at school / clubs / any other activities - are there other places or times that the [alleged abuser] spends time with children?
• Extraordinary gift giving, money, treats, outings unless previously approved by the parent - when was the last time [child] was given a treat or gift from the [alleged abuser]? What about the other children in the home?